Sleepytime

It's really quite astonishing, what impact a good night sleep can have.

Zachery has always been a problematic child to get to sleep. This fact seems partially innate and partially a habit inculated into him by his mother. When Zachery was a baby his mother was extremely reluctant to put him in the crib and Zack, either sensing this reluctance or merely lucky enough to capitalize on it, would fuss relentlessly until his mother picked him up out of the crib and held him, whereupon he would drop off to sleep - until you gently placed him back in the crib again.

My solution (the typically insensitive lout of a father) was to leave him in the crib, let him cry until he fell asleep by himself. After a few nights of crying, he would learn to fall asleep on his own.

However, when I voiced this to my wife, she stared at me with a look on her face as if I had suggested soaking him in hollandaise sauce and leaving him out for wolves to eat...or as I quote "No child of my will be left crying in the dark - when he cries, he needs his mother." After several fruitless attempts to convince her (including a book on baby sleep habits) I sighed and resigned myself to the inevitable.

The thing about the inevitable is, that it is... well... inevitable. For the next two and a half years, my wife ended up rocking her child to sleep. Though I tried to spell her at times, Dad, it seemed, just wouldn't cut the mustard. Zack's biggest comfort at these times was his mothers's hair, which, since the day he was born, he would clench and hold in his tiny fists. My hair was too short. He would abandon the attempt and flail about, half-asleep, seeking his mothers long, soft hair and waking himself up quite thoroughly in the attempt. Even today, when extremely upset, he likes to sit on his mother's lap and play with her hair.

So far I've resisted the urge to say "I told you so." Well, the reason is more self-preservation then willpower....

Sleep is probably the single biggest determinator of a child's mood and, very probably, health. Lately we have discovered that Zack seems to need more sleep then he used to require. The key is mood, attitude and focus. Some children get cranky, others whine. A blessed few (or so I've been told) just fall asleep when they are tired. Zack becomes a self-grinding axe.

When Zack is overtired everything in life becomes more difficult.

He cannot decide what snack he wants before bed and every choice is wrong.

He is mad.

He is crying. He cheers up and wallops his Dad in the stomach. Dad says don't do that. He cries again and runs away into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him and refusing to brush his teeth for anyone except his Mother.

His Buzz Lightyear pyjamas, which he has worn countless times and has been very happy with, are suddenly uncomfortable and itchy (as are the other four pairs of pyjamas he then insists on trying on). Storytime ends too soon, the cat stepped on him, Daddy bumped him, the room is too hot, the room is too cold, the blanket is itchy, the story is scary, "Mommy, Daddy swore", his feet/teeth/back/neck/tummy is sore/upset, "Daddy is a big meanie", his pillow is uncomfortable, he needs a drink of water, Daddy's "tone" is upsetting him, he's still hungry, he can't get comfortable, why is it so dark....In some cases the litany of complaints and imagined slights continues until he suddenly (once in mid-sentence), blessedly drops off to sleep.

If you don't have children, you can't truly know the sheer flood of relief and nervous exhaustion this event brings - that it is finally, at least this night (touch wood), over. Bear in mind, this type of relentless cranky activity can and does go on at times for hours, steadily winding you up until you think, you can't quite possibly stand another single syllable, another tear, or another whine...but somehow you do, manufacturing patience out of humor and thin air and eventually, no matter how much the endless carping seems to sustain the kids beyond all pratical measure, they succumb to sleep.

Thank God.

Until tomorrow....

Comments are always welcome. You can reach me at dadchronicles(at)hotmail.com.